The New Black: Jeckyll, Hyde style

A Column By DAVID MATTESON

This school has a serious case of style delirium.

Students apparently have not figured out what is appropriate to wear when in an academic setting and what to wear when going out at night.  The clothes worn at school are different than those that should be worn when going to dinner, hanging out with friends or going on a date.  This lesson needs to be seriously hammered into the minds of each style-confused pupil.

It’s ridiculous to walk down the halls and see a silly girl walking (well, trying to walk) in high heels, and at the same time a boy in sweatpants sloshing to his next class.  Neither is appropriate for school, and it is style mistakes like these that make schools impose uniforms.  Get it together guys, or else every student is going to be pulling on a pair of khaki pants and tucking in a white polo.

The key is to separate closets and products by school appropriate looks and going-out styles and to never mix and match.  The concept is what this style crazed columnist refers to as pulling a “Jeckyll and Hyde.”  So, here are some simple tips to follow when re-organizing one’s mismatched closet.

Leave your Braves shirts for school only. There is nothing more nauseating then seeing someone at the movies wearing a “Go Braves” sweatshirt.  Students are confined to the fluorescent-lit dungeons of Boone High School for five days of the week already.  Seeing flashy school spirited apparel on the weekends simply reminds others that they have to return to school on Monday morning, which will depress them for the rest of their evening.

There is no excuse for wearing Boone apparel off campus.  Even if it’s one’s favorite T-shirt or comfiest sweatshirt.  Even if it’s laundry day and everything else is in the wash.  No excuses.  Those nasty school spirit clothes are forbidden.  The same goes for those truly unfortunate “Senior” sweatshirts that Herff Jones gave out to the senior class.  If one’s not at school, do not wear it.

Keep it classy, not trashy. An academic setting does not call for teens to come to school with excessively exposed skin.  If one’s shorts or skirts are too short, then leave them for when trying to attract someone on a date.  It’s so unnecessary to show off that much skin when at school.  Girls, believe it or not, no one cares if you have awesome legs or impressive cleavage when they’re trying to take notes.  Come to class looking professional and not with your goodies hanging out.  It’s violating.

At the same time, boys need to keep their pants on.  No one wants to see your basketball shorts or boxers.  There are belts for a reason, and they should be utilized.  When you’re “chillin’ with your homies,” let them sag all you want.  Just keep them up at school.

Not too flashy. When confined to a classroom, nothing one is wearing should stand out too much.  Ladies, while bright eye shadow and dark eyeliner are appropriate for venues like clubs and concerts, they are unnecessary for school.  Separate makeup into basics that are for everyday wear and night looks for going out.  The same goes for products overall.  Hair should be clean and tamed when at school.  Go crazy and try something wild when going out for a night on the town.

Don’t overload on jewelry or accessories.  Hearing an armful of bangles clang together distracts others from trying to pay attention to the lesson.  While on the topic of jewelry, class rings should be worn solely at school.  They look so gaudy in the limelight of the real world.

Finally, shoes should be flat.  Girls, stilettos are certainly called for when going downtown, but no one wants to see you teeter back and forth in the school stairwell.  Boys should have a great pair of boots or dress shoes reserved for going to clubs or restaurants at night.  While at school, everyone should wear flats, tennis shoes or sandals.

Separating a closet between going out and school appropriate styles is truly necessary.  If everyone would simply Jeckyll and Hyde their look, the Reservation would certainly be a much more appropriate and attractive school.